While taking care of his elderly parents, Steven Petrow started making lists of “things I won’t do when I get old.” Clearly Petrow had problems with dealing with his aging parents and disagreed with them on many issues. For example, his parents resisted hearing aids.
Petrow’s parents also insisted on continuing to drive despite indications that they shouldn’t. As Petrow discovered, older people can be stubborn. When Petrow suggested helpful aids like a walker or adult incontinence pads, he triggered a lot of “push back.”
Glancing at Petrow’s list below you’ll see what he learned from caring for his elderly parents and how he’s planning for his own “later years.” Petrow provides a window into caregiving and steps we can all take to meet the problems of aging.
Do you have a plan for your “Golden Years”? GRADE: B+
Table of Contents:
Introduction: I Won’t Become Like My Parents When I Get Old 1
Part I Stupid Things I Won’t do Today 9
I Won’t Color My Hair (Even If It Worked for Diane Sawyer) 11
I Won’t Double-Space After Periods 18
I Won’t Be Afraid to Fall (Yes, You Read That Right) 26
I Won’t Stop Rocking Those “Too Young for You” Outfits 31
I Won’t Limit Myself to Friends My Own Age 36
I Won’t Lie About My Age (Even on Dating Apps) 42
I Won’t Join the “Organ Recital” 48
I Won’t Deny That I’m Slow to Rise (and I’m Okay with That) 53
I Won’t Avoid Looking at Myself Naked in the Mirror 59
I Won’t Become a Miserable Malcontent, a Cranky Curmudgeon, or a Surly Sourpuss 64
I Won’t Pass Up a Chance to Pee (Even When I Don’t Have To) 69
I Won’t Lie to My Doctor Anymore (Because These Lies Can Kill) 73
I Won’t Refuse to Change My Ways 79
I Won’t Tell My Life Story When Someone Asks, “How Are You?” 85
I Won’t Get My Knickers in a Twist at “Okay, Boomer” 89
I Won’t Be Honest to a Fault When Lying Is Kinder 92
I Won’t Worry About What I Can’t Control 96
I Won’t Stop Believing in Magic 101
Part II Stupid Things I Won’t do Tomorrow 107
I Won’t Blame the Dog for My Leaky Pipes 109
I Won’t Keep Driving When I Become a Threat to Others 114
I Won’t Stop Enjoying Myself (and Yes, I’ll Have the Occasional Candy Bar) 122
I Won’t Hoard the Butter Pats 125
I Won’t Wait Until I’m Deaf to Get a Hearing Aid (or, “What? What Did You Say?”) 130
I Won’t Fall Prey to Scams, Schemes, or Sleazeballs 136
I Won’t Burden My Family with Taking Care of Me 142
I Won’t Let a Walker Ruin My Style (but I’ll Still Use It) 150
I Won’t Smell like a Decrepit Old Man 155
I Won’t Whine About How Much Things Cost 160
I Won’t Play the Age Card 164
I Won’t Forget My Manners 167
I Won’t Be Ordering the Early Bird Special 172
I Won’t Turn My House into a Sweat Lodge 177
I Won’t Repeat Stories More Than One Hundred Times 180
I Won’t Be Unkind to Those with Dementia 184
I Won’t Let Anyone Treat Me with Disrespect 189
I Won’t Lose My Balance 194
Part III Stupid Things I Won’t do at “The End” 199
I Won’t Depart This Life Without Someone Holding My Hand 201
I Won’t Let Anything Stop Me from Saying I Love You … and Goodbye 207
I Won’t Postpone for Tomorrow What Matters to Me Today 216
I Won’t Let Anyone Else Write My Obituary 221
I Wont Forget to Plan My Own Funeral 224
I Won’t Die Without Writing Letters to My Loved Ones 229
I Won’t Be Disappointed by My Life 237
Afterword 245
Acknowledgments 251
About the Authors 257