All right, I confess. I bought this book because of the great Brom cover. And I had a 40% BORDERS coupon. I’m doing all this tap-dancing because I really can’t recommend this book. “Queen of the Black Coast,” “Jewels of Gwalhur,” and “The Devil in Iron” are not the strongest Conan stories. The best Conan the Barbarian book now available is published by DEL REY: The Coming of Conan the Cimmerian. Of course, this edition lacks the great Frazetta paintings, but you can find them elsewhere. What are included are the best of the Conan stories, 463 pages worth, for less than $12 (on AMAZON). A bargain! Of course, I read Conan as Lancer Books (remember them?) brought out those classic paperbacks with the unforgettable covers. So skip “…and their memory was a bitter tree…” and invest in The Coming of Conan the Cimmerian. If you haven’t read these wonderful stories of swords & sorcery, you’re in for a treat. If you haven’t read these classic stories in a while, you’ll find they hold up well. Robert E. Howard knew how to write a gripping adventure story.

I’ve been a fan of Diane Ravitch for decades. It seemed like Ravitch was one of the few national figures who “got it” on education issues. But then she joined the Bush Administration and drank the NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND Kool-Aid. The Death and Life of the Great American School System: How Testing and Choice Are Undermining Education tells Ravitch’s story of how she came to her senses. My favorite chapter in Ravitch’s book is “What Would Mrs. Ratliff Do?” Mrs. Ratliff was Diane Ravitch’s favorite teacher when she was in High School. Mrs. Ratliff was demanding and piled on the work. She did not teach “self-esteem.” She taught Literature and Composition to teenagers. No multiple choice tests, no fill in the blanks. The students were required to write essays on a regular basis. Mrs. Ratliff taught Shakespeare, Dickens, Kipling, Keats, Johnson, Hardy, and other literary heavy-weights. No dumbed down readings. Ravitch confesses that she bought in to the educational testing that has so warped teaching today. Teach to the test! What a waste of time! Ravitch also was an early proponent of charter schools, but now sees that they aren’t being regulated so the education most of those kids are getting is zilch. I’m glad Ravitch came to her senses. GRADE: B+

I confess: I was late to appreciating GLEE. Diane loved the FOX show from the start. She kept telling me how much fun it was to watch this rag-tag group of misfits who would suddenly burst into song until she wore down my resistance. The first couple episodes I watched didn’t grab me, but I slowly got involved with the high school student characters and their hapless (but earnest) teacher, Will Schuester, played by Matthew Morrison. My favorite character is the sadistic Sue Sylvester, played by the talented Jane Lynch. Lynch, as head coach of the “Cheerios” cheerleading squad, is the Glee Club’s arch-nemesis. Guest stars include Kristin Chenoweth, Josh Groban, Olivia Newton-John, and Idina Menzel. There is so little innovation or creativity on television right now, GLEE manages qualify as “cutting edge” in these frivolous times.

Lame, moronic, stupid. These are just some of the words that come to mind when I think about my experience watching the dreadful film, KILLERS. Ashton Kutcher plays a spy whose assignment to is terminate an arms dealer in Nice. Katherine Heigl plays an insipid young woman who immediately falls for Kutcher who tells her he’s a “business consultant.” Kutcher decides to “retire” from his profession and live a “normal” life with Heigl as a building contractor. They marry and three years later, all of their neighbors start trying to kill Kutcher and Heigl. What, you say, that doesn’t make any sense? Well, how about Katherine Heigl sitting on a toilet giving herself a pregnancy test? Or Ashton Kutcher who constantly takes his shirt off. Sounds really funny, right? Obviously, the makers of this disaster smoked too much weed during the writing and filming of this piece of crap. Do not attend this movie unless you’re forced to at gun-point. GRADE: F

President Barack Obama visited Carnegie-Mellon University last week. Patrick was one of 22 students invited to attend the President’s speech. Patrick took some pictures during the event. You’ll find them here. By looking at Patrick’s photos, you’ll see how close he got to the President. The closest I came to a President was in 1960 when JFK visited Niagara Falls. My Mom and Dad, good Democrats, took me to the Airport with them to see the President. JFK walked by about 10 feet away from us. Even though I was only 11 years old, it seemed like a Big Deal to me at the time.

JoAnn Falletta is the conductor of the Buffalo Philharmonic Orchestra. She is also a talented guitarist in her own right. A few years ago, she organized The JoAnn Falletta International Guitar Concerto Competition. Year by year, it has grown in popularity and drawn more talented artists to compete. Diane and I attended the Final Competition last night and loved the wonderful music. Nermanja Ostojic from Serbia played Mario Casteinuovo-Tedesco’s “Concerto in D Major, Opus 9.” Artyom Dervoed from Russia played Rodrigo’s “Concierto de Aranjuez.” Thomas Viloteau from France played Rodrigo’s “Fantasia para un Gentilhombre.” Diane and I voted for Thomas Viloteau, but he came in Third Place. Artyom Dervoed won First Place. If you’re interested in guitar music, this is an event you should consider attending in 2012. For more information, click here.

Keith Laumer is best known for his Retief and BOLO science fiction series. But, from time to time, Laumer would explore other science fiction themes in individual novels. The Infinite Cage begins with a man who’s lost his memory escaping from a police station. The man calls himself “Adam” and runs a gauntlet of social problems: getting a job, learning about women, dealing with corruption. Laumer tells this parable to expose the social problems and inequalities of our culture as Adam tries to “fit in.” Despite Adam’s ability to read minds, his ability to learn a language in minutes, his success in the stock market, disaster after disaster dogs him. If you’re looking for an unusual social parable, give The Infinite Cage a try.

This new edition of Film Noir: The Encyclopedia expands several of the movie descriptions, contains more photos, and in general updates the genre. The last update was in 1993 so this new, Fourth Edition, version should be the reference book of record when it comes to noir. Overlook Press should be commended on putting out such a quality product. If you’re interested in this genre, this book is a must-buy. GRADE: A

In answer to Patti Abbott’s question about what painting represents your taste in reading (at http://pattinase.blogspot.com/), the Jack Vettriano painting above captures my noirish obsessions.

Government conspiracy is at the heart of The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest. And yes, things won’t make much sense unless you’ve read The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo and The Girl Who Played With Fire before you tackle this 563-page baggy monster. Rumors abound that a large fragment of a fourth novel exists. Stieg Larsson died before he could finish the fourth book of what was planned as a 10 book series. I think all three novels read like First Drafts. Perhaps Larsson died before the books could be edited and that’s why they are so discursive and flawed. But, there’s no denying that Stieg Larsson knew how to tell a story. GRADE: B