Lame, moronic, stupid. These are just some of the words that come to mind when I think about my experience watching the dreadful film, KILLERS. Ashton Kutcher plays a spy whose assignment to is terminate an arms dealer in Nice. Katherine Heigl plays an insipid young woman who immediately falls for Kutcher who tells her he’s a “business consultant.” Kutcher decides to “retire” from his profession and live a “normal” life with Heigl as a building contractor. They marry and three years later, all of their neighbors start trying to kill Kutcher and Heigl. What, you say, that doesn’t make any sense? Well, how about Katherine Heigl sitting on a toilet giving herself a pregnancy test? Or Ashton Kutcher who constantly takes his shirt off. Sounds really funny, right? Obviously, the makers of this disaster smoked too much weed during the writing and filming of this piece of crap. Do not attend this movie unless you’re forced to at gun-point. GRADE: F
Stop, you’re killing me!
Sounds great.
I must admit, I’m with the neighbors on this one.
Diane owes you, big time.
😉
KILLERS doesn’t plumb the depths of Awfulness that my Worst Movie of All Time candidate, THE AVENGERS, does, Jeff. But it skates pretty close.
Just looking at that picture (for a moment, I thought that was Britney Spears with Ashton Kutcher) tells me I won’t be seeing the movie!
I’m flummoxed by the apparent popularity of Aston Kutcher, Deb. He seems like a dim bulb to me. And Katherine Heigl was…Katherine Heigl.
Don’t hold back, George. If you didn’t like it, you can tell us.
You can read between the lines, Bill.
Caption for that picture: “Damn, I just crapped my pants.”
Or, “Damn, I’m in a crappy movie! That really screws up my next movie deal!”
Just don’t understand the Aston Kutcher thing either. And Katherine, only a little more.
And what was Tom Selleck doing in KILLERS, Patti? He should fire his agent!
She’s pretty and I used to like her (in Roswell, for instance) but her “quirky” performances are wearing very thin these days.
Kutcher found his perfect role in That 70s Show and everything since has been downhill.
Ashton Kutcher is NOT silver screen material, Jeff. He needs to go back to TV.
1. smoking weed would likely have made the film better, not worse.
2. The L.A. Times gave this one of the worst pans I’ve seen in a while.
3, I don’t try to “understand” actors any more. Fact is, most of the time I don;’t even know who they are. I do listen to the soundtracks, though. 🙂
4. Hmm, there was going to be a #4, but now I forgot what it is. It’s not even 7:00 am here, maybe I should have some coffee.
KILLERS starts off with nice scenes of Nice, Italy, Rick. They should have stayed there. At least the scenery would have been an improvement over the “typical suburban neighborhood” where most of the movie takes place. The LA TIMES is right to pan KILLERS. This is a movie that should never have been made. Or if made, never released. Hope you’re caffeinated by now!
Oh, I remember: no Mailbox Monday, George?
I hit another book sale over the weekend, Rick. MAILBOX MONDAY would take up about a 100 books worth of space. Too much.
What amazes me is not that crap like this gets made and released but rather that directors who make one turkey after another keep getting jobs. It can’t be that difficult to find another director, surely.
That directors can make Bad Movie after Bad Movie mystifies me too, Jeff. But in these tough economic times, the Hollywood Rules may change…
I think Hollywood should hire George and his son Patrick to co-direct a film. With George’s grasp of plot and dialogue and Patrick’s artistic eye, it would be a sure winner. Just no remakes, okay?
My dream is that someday the tools to create films with software and AI will allow anyone to create movies, Rick. Patrick has the artistic gene that somehow escaped me.
Dare I ask what Diane thought?
Diane thought KILLERS was okay, Beth. She has a high tolerance for any kind of Romantic Comedy just as I have a weakness for Action Movies.
OK, I admit it, even after reading your (I’m guessing very accurate review) I still want to see it. I also have a high tolerence for romantic comedies. I do like Ashton, but agree his best role was on 70’s show. Hey dude, where’s my car was a bit of a continuation of that role.
But before I see that, want to see Iron Man2, Robin Hood, Sex & City2, Prince of Persia, The A-Team, and Twilight3.
I haven’t seen many movies this year, and the last 2 were when I was having a new roof put on and had to escape noise.
Had Mike Bursaw (mystery mike) out last week to buy books, and he shipped 48 boxes yippee
Good luck, Maggie. KILLERS is a stinker. You’ll like IRON MAN 2 and possibly ROBIN HOOD (my reviews are below). Congratulations on moving those 48 boxes of books!
(No relation that I’m aware of to Maggie Mason–though the ears always perk up at the sound of booksales)
Heigl gave distressingly dull answers to the ROTTEN TOMATOES cable tv show query, what are your favorite romantic scenes in films?…I think she has talent, but no taste, along with usually looking a bit better than Spears, but not so much in the still above. It’s the Elvis Presley/Whitney Houston, et al. syndrome. I’m always particularly flummoxed when an artist of any sort or caliber has no apparent interest in the history or previous accomplishments in their art. You can see, if you must, a fair amount of Kutcher in pay-cable movie channels this month. Nothing actually good, mind you.
I’ll have to introduce you to the lovely Maggie Mason, Todd. She’s very knowledgeable about books since she had her own business for years. I’ve found Katherine Heigl to be vacuous. Right now, Heigl is in Pittsburgh filming ONE FOR THE MONEY.